New Study Reveals Why Lesbian Couples Divorce at Higher Rates Than Their Counterparts

A new study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family finds that lesbian couples are significantly more likely to divorce than gay male or heterosexual couples. The research, titled “Same-Sex and Different-Sex Couples’ Divorce Risks: The Role of Cohabitation and Childbearing,” analyzed data from all legal unions between 2003 and 2020.

The results surprised everyone — including the research team that led the study. Here’s a closer look at the findings, which highlight two major life factors that impact the stability of lesbian marriages.

Why are lesbian marriages ending at a higher rate?

The study analyzed more than 5,300 same-sex couples, including about 3,412 female-female couples and 1,892 male-male pairings. It also examined over 450,000 different-sex couples. Within a decade of marriage, 41% of lesbian couples had divorced, compared with 27% of gay male couples and 22% of heterosexual couples. After adjusting for age, education, and nationality, researchers found that lesbian couples were more than twice as likely to divorce as heterosexual couples. They were also about 20% more likely to separate than gay male couples.

Lead author Maria Elina Ponkilainen, a doctoral researcher at the University of Helsinki, said previous studies had documented the higher risk but hadn’t identified clear reasons. “Prior studies have shown that same-sex couples, especially female couples, have a higher divorce risk than different-sex couples across several countries. However, the explanations for female couples’ higher divorce risk are unclear,” Ponkilainen explained to PsyPost. With this in mind, the Finnish team set out to probe possible factors behind the trend, focusing on two big life events — moving in together and having children.

Moving in together and having kids can cause a world of problems.

One stereotype about lesbian relationships is summed up in the tongue-in-cheek “U-Haul joke” — the idea that women in queer relationships move in together right away. But the study found that timing isn’t about when couples move in; it’s about how long they live together before marrying. Same-sex couples who lived together longer before tying the knot had notably lower divorce risks.

Lesbian couples who cohabited for at least seven years before marriage had the lowest annual divorce rate — about 1.9% per year — compared with 0.9% for gay male couples. In contrast, couples who married within the same year of moving in saw much higher divorce rates, roughly 8.2% per year for lesbians.

Researchers also explored how children affect divorce risk. They analyzed two scenarios: couples who entered the marriage with children from previous relationships and couples who had a child together during the marriage. Across all couple types, having children from prior relationships increased the odds of divorce. Navigating stepparenting and blended family dynamics often adds extra strain. However, this effect was smaller for same-sex couples, especially lesbian spouses.

Babies born within a marriage usually strengthen relationships — but less so for lesbians. Having children didn’t lower divorce risk for lesbian couples as much as it did for straight couples. The researchers were surprised. They had expected shared parenthood to stabilize lesbian unions, especially given the effort and resources many two-mom families invest in having children.

Do you think having kids brings couples closer or adds more stress? Comment below!