BY: Walker
Published 1 year ago
In the quiet moments, Connie Boss Alexander still finds herself picking up her phone to text her late son — beloved dancer, father of three and Ellen DeGeneres Show DJ and executive producer, Stephen “tWitch” Boss.
via: ET Online
Connie tells People how she is choosing to remember the beloved dancer.
“When I think about him, I try not to dwell on how he left this earth,” she says. “This is not totally the end. That is where my peace comes from.”
Boss was found dead inside of motel room on Dec. 13, 2022. He was 40, and his death was ruled a suicide.
In the five months since his passing, Connie says that time is tricky when it comes to measuring how long it has been since she has seen her son.
“Sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday, and then other times it feels like it’s been so long since I’ve seen him,” she shares.
Connie says that there are times when she thinks if there was a moment she could have stepped in or helped, noting that it’s still shocking that her son is dead.
“You find yourself in a lot of introspection, a lot of looking back. Did I miss something? Did he mean something when he said this? It was just very, very shocking,” she tells the magazine. “I don’t know when or if I’ll ever accept it. At this point, I’m in realization, I guess. When I wake up in the morning, it does hit me that, oh my God, he really is not physically here. But then in my head I can hear him say, ‘Hey, Mom. I’m okay.'”
In May, Boss’ wife, Allison Holker, did her first television interview since her husband’s death.
“No one’s ready for that moment and there’s no one that saw this coming. No one — and that breaks my heart too,” she told Today’s Hoda Kotb.
Together the couple shared children, 14-year-old daughter, Weslie, whom Boss adopted, their son Maddox, 7, and daughter Zaia, 3.
Holker said at the time that she is just trying to be strong for her kids whom she is helping navigate the world without their father.
“I don’t really have any other choice but to be strong,” she admitted, tearing up. “Now, they still see me have my highs and lows because there’s a lot of it. All I can do is just try to move forward. It’s honestly something I wouldn’t wish for anybody. It’s really hard. But if I’ve learned anything, it’s that communication is key.”