Are We the “50/50 Couple?” Money Conversations Every Couple Should Have Before Getting Engaged

This article is sponsored by Discover®, who believes in empowering couples towards financial confidence and stability. Because when it comes to love and money, everyone deserves to feel secure about their future.

You’ve got the perfect partner! You two have the love, inside jokes, and mutual obsession with finding the best food spots. But have you had the money talk yet? Before saying yes to forever, couples must discuss finances because love may be priceless, but bills are very real.

Research consistently shows that money is a top cause of relationship stress. That alone is enough to make anyone double-check their bank statements. Financial red flags could create serious issues if ignored. 

Does your partner avoid talking about money altogether? Do they have excessive debt but no plan to tackle it? Are they secretive about spending habits? These are all signs that could lead to future financial stress. Spotting these red flags early allows couples to address them before walking down the aisle.

Here are five tough yet essential money conversations every couple should have.

1. Are We a 50/50 Couple or an Income-Based Couple?

Splitting everything evenly sounds great until one of you earns significantly more. A fair financial system doesn’t necessarily have to mean a strict 50/50 split but rather an approach that reflects both partners’ incomes, spending habits, and financial goals. Have an open chat about what feels right for both of you. Will you split the rent equally, or will the higher earner cover more? How will you handle vacations, groceries, and big purchases? Getting clear on expectations now avoids resentment later.

2. Lay It All Out There

That means credit card balances, student loans, car payments, etc. Financial transparency is key because debt impacts both of you once you’re legally bound. If one partner has significant debt, discuss a plan. Will you tackle it together or keep finances separate? Ignoring debt won’t make it disappear, but having a strategy makes it manageable.

3. How Do We Handle Everyday Expenses?

If you grab takeout three times a week and suffer from impulse spending, you are not alone!  But how do those everyday expenses fit into your bigger financial picture? Some couples prefer a joint account for shared expenses, while others keep everything separate and send money to each other through mobile payment services. Will you set a budget? Will you have a “fun money” allowance? Discussing day-to-day spending helps avoid those “You spent what on coffee?” moments.

4. What’s Our Financial Future?

Getting caught up in the now is easy, but long-term financial goals deserve just as much attention. Are you saving for a home? Planning to invest? Are you dreaming of quitting your 9-to-5 for a passion project? Talk about what financial success looks like for both of you and what steps you need to take to get there. Your partner’s vision of financial stability might not match yours, and that’s OK—as long as you work toward a shared plan. Seeking a financial advisor or taking a financial literacy course together can strengthen your knowledge and give you practical tools to reach your goals.

5. What Happens If One of Us Loses Our Job?

Life is unpredictable. Layoffs, career changes, or unexpected emergencies can shake up solid financial plans. Do you have an emergency fund? How will expenses be handled if one of you is suddenly unemployed or falls ill? During a “$pill The Tea” interview by Discover, one of the interviewees explained how having a financially independent partner is crucial, and knowing they would be there for you when the money slows or stops is nice. Ultimately, it creates a sense of financial security.

Money talks aren’t exactly the most romantic part of future planning, but they’re needed. Understanding each other’s financial mindset helps build trust and partnership. So, before you pop the question or say “yes,” grab a drink and start the conversation. Your future selves will thank you!

This site is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for professional advice. The material on this site is not intended to provide legal, investment, or financial advice and does not indicate the availability of any Discover product or service. It does not guarantee that Discover offers or endorses a product or service. For specific advice about your unique circumstances, you may wish to consult a qualified professional. 

What is one thing couples should discuss when talking about money? Comment below!