The jail-bound Lindsay Lohan in the September issue of Elle magazine, dishes about being in rehab, her boy-toy Calum Best and how she relates to Marilyn Monroe.

Here are some noteworthy quotes from the interview that occurred just days before her May DUI arrest:

Li-Lo on her January rehab stint:

“I was glad I went, because I needed to get away from everyone. … And I learned a lot there.”

Li-Lo on saying “I’ll never do …”:

“You’re setting yourself up for a disaster. I never say never.”

Li-Lo who on her caretakers:

“Jenni (Munro, one of her assistants), my mom and Leslie (Sloane-Zelnick, her publicist).”

Li-Lo on her relationship with British model Calum Best:

“He’s me in male form. We’re very similar. Stubborn, rebellious, very smart, coy, a little bit narcissistic.”

Li-Lo on her idols that she relates to: “

Ann-Margret. Marilyn Monroe. … Marilyn exudes sex appeal. She was such an innocent sort. … That was the tragic side of it.”

I think that Elle’s readers really don’t want to hear anymore about Li-Lo, but for some reason I do. No matter what, I believe in the talent of this naturally beautiful confused young soul.

[Source]

Listen to Tarin Graham’s (Lindsay’s former assistant) mother, frantic call to the police while she was being chased by Lindsay’s white GMC Denali HERE!

WTF? Read what the New York Post had to say below:

Lohan’s former assistant, Tarin Graham, “is a problem individual and Lindsay was trying to help her out,” the actress’ uncle, Chris Sullivan, told The Post. Graham’s “mother got involved and became hysterical.” “She [Lindsay] may well have not been driving the car. This girl and her mother are letting Lindsay take the fall, but hopefully the truth will come out! That would get rid of most of the charges.” Officers responding to a 911 call from Graham’s mom Tuesday found Lohan and the woman in a “heated” argument in the Santa Monica Civic Auditorium parking lot and then noticed the actress was reeking of booze. Lohan then flunked field sobriety tests and cops measured her blood alcohol level to be more than 0.12, well above California’s 0.08 threshold for drunken driving. Lohan had a rap for driving under the influence hanging over her from a fender-bender in late May. She was arrested and booked by Santa Monica cops Tuesday for alleged DUI, driving with a suspended license, possession of cocaine and transport of narcotics.

Seriously love muffins, you can’t make this s#!t up. Let’s further analyze this situation. As stated earlier, People magazine and every other media source on the planet is reporting that Lindsay Lohan was arrested at 2:15 this morning for DUI and driving with a suspended license! To make matters worse, cocaine was found in her possession! Bail was set at $25,000!

There are so many things wrong with this situation. Why not count them down!
1. Where was the ankle monitor when she really needs it?
First off, wasn’t this chick prancing around town voluntarily wearing that DUI ankle monitor to show how clean and sober she was? I think she was using the damn thing wrong. Maybe she was using it to tell her where to find alcohol as opposed to detecting her own levels?

2. Was she awake during the whole Paris fiasco?
Didn’t she see what happened to her friend Paris? If Paris got 45 days in jail (reduced to 23 for good behavior) for driving with a suspended license, then what is Lindsay going to get for driving with a suspended license, DUI, and cocaine in the car!

3. Cocaine, Cocaine, Cocaine
In the words of the late and sometimes great Rick James, “Cocaine is a hell of a drug!” (Thanx for the correction YoungATL). As if driving with a DUI days after rehab wasn’t enough, she had to go and up the ante.

4. That Mug Shot
We’re finally reminded of what a mug shot is supposed to look like. Let’s face it, Paris and Nicole had gorgeous mug shots. Lindsay on the other hand is showing just what an early morning arrest is supposed to look like. This is how the stars look with fluorescent lighting and no photoshop.

5. The Talented One
What’s sad is that of all the girls fucking up their lives right now, she’s one of the only ones with credible talent. It’s truly sad to see. It just goes to show that even with celebrity and fame, people are still human an subject to the same demons that dig at everyone else.

This is getting really old and tired.

According to TMZ.com, drunkass Lindsay Lohan was arrested on drunk-driving charges in Santa Monica, Calif., early this morning.

The site quotes unnamed police sources saying the actress, 21, was found with cocaine in her pocket. Lohan’s blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13 (the legal limit is.08). She was reportedly chasing a Cadillac Escalade in her white Denali. When cops stopped her, she flunked the “walk the line” test and refused to take the breathilizer.

She was just released at $25,000 bail. Apparently that hi-tech SCRAM anklet she’s been sporting is just a fashion statement because the makers, when contacted, were unaware that she was even arrested!

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan have joined forces. The two Hollywood socialites put their past differences behind them and celebrated their new found freedom together on the 4th of July. Well I think it would be party time if I had just been released from jail or rehab for that matter! Fresh air! Freedom! (I wonder how long this reconciliation will last.. 2days?)

and Paris is starting to grow on me again! Someone please tell me why I’m starting to like her again.