THE 
October 15, 2009 Give Your Ex The Axe
Okay Love Muffins, as we know there is no guidebook to this dating game. But there are some things that you think would be obvious, however, some people just don’t get it! It’s not that they’re intentionally trying to turn you off, but certain conversation topics are a certified no-no! The no-no of which I speak is the ex. Of course we have been in relationships before but that should not be discussed more than briefly. What it does is send red flags that you are not over your last significant other and that you maybe dating prematurely. Love muffins, if you hear these opening statements or use them yourself, then you should really take some time and figure out whether or not you are ready to date!
“My ex is beautiful and a model” - Your new date has no desire to know how attractive your ex was, period. It displays a lack of sensitivity, especially if the person you’re with is not runway ready or then next top model! It also shows that you might have a preference for a certain look rather than the core of a person. Shallow is no bueno.
“My ex is still in love with me” - nobody wants to know that someone’s heart is still bleeding for you! If the person you’re on a date with is catching feelings for you, then this translates to rebound and premature exits. It throws up a wall that is hard to break through once it’s up.
“My ex and I were into all the same things”- This no longer matters, because it’s over, right? Or is it? How does the person you’re now dating stand a chance if they’re not into sports and corndogs or extreme cage fighting? If you’re really feeling this new person of interest, you will explore new things together and get to know some of things they like to do.
“My ex was down for whatever”- this is a mega no! Okay, so your ex was a freak but that has no place in the dating process! It’s just inappropriate and really rude. I believe that’s all that needs to be said about that. The newbie could have a wild side but lost the desire to share it with you because of this kind of statement.
“Me and my ex were going to get married”- but you didn’t. This statement further shows your connection to the ex. Don’t carry that heavy baggage into a fresh courtship! If you were once engaged, fine. But disengage from appearing as if you’re pining over the idea that you were supposed to be married to another person.
Bottom line, Love muffins, just make sure you’re over your ex when you jump into the dating game again. It’s a turn-off to someone who is genuinely wanting to get to know you! So get out there and try something new, because doing the same thing will only get you the same results! Have fun, be yourself and breathe, lovies!
Double Kisses!
kokobongo
October 15, 2009 at 10:55 am
Why do men do that. That is so corny. The picture, falls by ‘accident’. you ignore her pic and then he says, Oh, that picture that just fell. WTF. um I wasn’t trying to acknowlege her picture and where does a bikini picture come from ? it fell from the heavens? How lame. LOL
Yeah
October 15, 2009 at 11:38 am
It’s funny how perpetually single people who have not had a dedicated long-term relationship always feel they have good dating advice. People should be themselves and go with the flow. Once you start putting up someone else and their rules you start living their life. Just live your life.
leelee
October 15, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Yeah that tends to happen a lot with people. It mostly happens when someone hasn’t been in a relationship in forever. It is a huge turn off. One thing to pay attention to as well is how they say it. If it’s something bad and they sound like they are still harboring some feelings towards the situation then they aren’t over that person.
Mashawnda Dowell
October 16, 2009 at 5:56 am
May fav line—“Me and my ex were going to get married”- but you didn’t.
Almostmarried
October 16, 2009 at 9:44 pm
But B, wouldn’t you want this new person to know that you are wifey material, because your lucky enough to have someone want to marry you??? Granted I called the marriage off because I wasnt ready, but I feel that new people shouldn’t waste time with me if their testing the waters, Im worthy of exclusivity., and later commitment.