THE 
July 14, 2008 25 Ways You Know Your Man Ain’t Sh*t!
Several weeks ago, I made a video about my ‘Top 5 Ways You Know Your Man Ain’t Sh*t’, and I decided to pile all the comments left on the video and from my email and pick out the best twenty-five. This list is in no particular order – they are all equal to me, so lets get started. You know your man ain’t sh*t if…
…your man hollers “Tyrone” while having sex, but your name is Stephanie!
…he uses your car all day and returns it to you without filling up the gas tank – then has the nerve to ask you for $7.00 dollars so he can get a pack of cigarettes and a 40 oz!
…the only time he calls you is when it’s past 9pm, because his minutes are unlimited!
…you have video footage of him having sex with another girl, but he denies it and said that it wasn‘t him, but you know it’s him because his name is tattooed on his right a$$ cheek!
…he asks to take you out on a date, but you end up paying!
…after having mind blowing hanging from the ceiling fan sex, your man has to leave! You ain’t no booty call machine!
…he is a 47 year old man still living in the basement at his momma’s crib, and complains that his momma doesn’t do his laundry right or drives him to work on time!
…he asks to borrow $50 dollars once a week and he promises to pay you back, but he ain’t got a job. You better tell him Chip ‘N Dales are hiring!
…he receives a late night call and jumps over the living room couch, heads for the kitchen, rolls under the kitchen table to reach the bathroom just to tell his side chick that he can’t talk right now!
…he eats all your food and complains when you don’t restock the pantry!
…he asks you to make your booty clap in front of his boys!
…he sees the waiter and excuses himself to go to the restroom, but you turn towards the window several minutes later and catch him hitting it down the road!
…every time he comes in to kiss you, his breath smells like feet and a$$ with a hint of garlic!
…he wants a BJ but he won’t return the favor!
…you ask to borrow $5.00 dollars and he says, “Let me ask my momma”!
…you call your man and right when he answers, you hear a female in the background moaning and he says no one is in the room with him, but there is someone because the T.V. doesn’t say, “Come on to bed”!
…you are about to wash your clothes and he asks if you can wash his clothes, because his momma ran out of laundry detergent!
…he texts you telling you to call him, because he doesn’t want to pay for the call!
…he has 10 kids running around calling him “daddy”, but hasn’t sent one lick of child support money!
…he has 10 kids running around calling him “daddy”, and uses your money to pay his child support!
…he likes to beat you in the head with his ding ding!
…he can’t keep a job longer then two weeks, because he is lazy!
…your friends and family don’t like him!
…before he leaves your house after having sex, he asks you to fill up his gas tank!
…your throat is a little parched, but he won’t get you water after having sex!
Takiyah
July 12, 2008 at 4:24 am
LMAO!!!! This has got to be the funniest thing I have read this week!!
Tallone30
July 12, 2008 at 8:04 am
These are hilarious, B! And too true!
Mz. Ci
July 12, 2008 at 8:48 am
These are super funny!!
bb
July 12, 2008 at 10:58 am
Once again, B.Scott should compile all of his top lists into a book. I would buy it, read it, pass it on to several people who know their boyfriend is a sorry piece of doo doo, and the world would be a little bit better for it all.
First Lady 1
July 12, 2008 at 1:09 pm
LMAO!!!!!! The sad part is there are fools in this world who do these things and still get even bigger fools to date them.
Court!
July 12, 2008 at 6:57 pm
Ha!!! Too funny but sadly too true!
NurseFAB
July 12, 2008 at 8:26 pm
all of these are so sad….yet so true! *sigh*
Southern Queen Dee
July 12, 2008 at 10:55 pm
I’m mad alot of these are true and there are women who put up with it..WTF!? These were funny as all hell, though!
Ms.NeeCee
July 13, 2008 at 1:38 am
HELLA FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KaNisa
July 13, 2008 at 2:05 pm
These are rather specific…kind of personal, huh?
mrsFAB
July 15, 2008 at 6:54 pm
LOLOLOLOLOL